With gladness and singleness of heart

47 days and counting. That's how much time I have remaining before classes begin. Only 13 working days left at the place I've worked for the past 10 1/4 years. Just 7 days until my 50th birthday. I'd say I need to have my head examined, but I just took care of that for the bishop and have been pronounced sane.

Welcome to the world of my blog. This is for all of you who have loved and prayed for and supported me these past years - many, many years - as I've discerned and run into brick walls and persevered and grieved and loved and laughed, in short, lived a life much like most of you. And now, finally, I am on the verge of beginning the realization of the the vocation to which I believe that I am called, priesthood in the Episcopal Church, heading off to Berkeley at Yale Divinity School to begin studies in a 3-year Master of Divinity degree program.

The title of this entry is taken from a post-communion prayer in the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer. I've been planning to write a book by that title for a very long time, but, like my seminary studies, it's taking longer to get around to that than would seem reasonable, but I've discovered that there's really nothing very reasonable about matters of faith and the heart. This title, though, describes very well what my life, for all its twists and turns and detours, has been about. This is not a gladness that manifests itself as a perpetually cheery outlook, because any one who knows me could easily put the lie to that! Nor is the singleness of heart about having no other interests or outlets than a calling in the church. No, I'd say that gladness and singleness of heart are the overarching position of my heart and mind as this life has unfolded.

Some of you know a great deal about me and how this mid-life change of course has unfolded. Some of you may just know bit and pieces. As I prepare for my studies to begin, I will try to unpack some of how I came to this place by way of providing background for what is to come. When classes begin, I have no idea how much writing I'll be able to do amidst my studies, but I hope to provide updates, not that I think anyone will hang onto my every word, but because I know that many of you are interested and supportive and may just want to know how I'm doing from time to time.

And for that last bit, let me express my gratitude at the outset. So many of you have believed in me even when I wasn't sure that the light at the end of the tunnel wasn't an oncoming train. You mourned with me over the death of my son, Seth, and rejoice with me in the unfolding life of my beautiful Rachel and her husband, Yohann. When the way was blocked in one diocese, some of you had to bid me farewell while others have welcomed me with open arms and heaped grace upon grace on my life. So, before I forget, I will say thank you to all of you who have walked this walk with me and will continue to do so as this new adventure begins.