At Marquand Chapel yesterday, the first of the new year and of the semester, we were asked to share with a neighbor where we have felt or seen the Holy Spirit moving in our lives recently, whether in the love of another person or a new sense of direction or whatever it might be. My seat-neighbor said he most experienced the spirit's presence when he thought of his wife and how he knew he could never do what he's doing without her. She's already talking about throwing him a party when he graduates, but what he wants to do is to throw her a party! I thought that was so wonderful, and it's certainly something with which I resonate. I think Tim and I will just throw a party for each other, and we might even invite some friends...
Having said that, where I clearly sensed that abiding and encouraging spirit was in my drive back to New Haven on Sunday. I was excited about coming back, so looking forward to seeing all of my new friends and curious about my new classes. As one of my friends here said, it's like being a giddy schoolgirl all over again! Some might believe that it's just excitement over the newness or the challenge, but when one views one's life through the lens of faith and vocation, it's hard not to see confirmation and affirmation of the call that I believe that I have to serve God in the church in the enthusiasm and joy that I feel as I return to school for the second semester. It's a far sight better that dreading the work or the challenges that surely lie ahead, and the beautiful thing about it is that it's all done in the community of Berkeley and YDS and with the love and prayers of my St. James and St. Peter's communities. It doesn't get much better than that.
So for those of you dying to know, this semester I will be taking part two of Hebrew (yes, I passed, so am returning for more!), the second half of Old Testament (for which the professor, John J. Collins, is the author of our textbook so I need not take notes if I'm not so inclined, and he has a marvelous Irish brogue, an added benefit!) and the second half of Transitional Moments (church history, this time covering the church in America), Ministry and the Disinherited taught by Frederick (Jerry) Streets whose specialty is trauma in global areas of conflict, and, finally, Introduction to Pastoral Care which will help prepare me for Clinical Pastoral Education next summer (CPE). I've been accepted into a CPE program with Diakon Lutheran Social Ministries and, although I don't yet have my placement, will probably will be working in a hospice or nursing home facility for 11 weeks during the summer. There is no summer resting for the weary seminarian!
So on this second auspiciously-dated day of this new year, the game's afoot. Carpe diem!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Saturday, January 1, 2011
1/1/11
A new year with auspicious numeration. I thought last year was auspicious enough - acceptance to Berkeley at Yale Divinity School, leaving my job at Episcopal Community Services after 10 years, moving away from home like some adolescent and beginning graduate school in New Haven. In today's New York Times, Oliver Sacks wrote an opinion piece on making resolutions to challenge your mind because, even in older years, the brain can be expanded and even rewired by new learning. Well, Dr. Sacks, I think I have that one covered.
I look forward to returning for a second semester of studies at YDS but am grateful for one more week to relax and putz around the house, spending time with the dogs and the cat if not Tim, who is leaving for business in NC tomorrow. I have so appreciated these two weeks of sleeping in, napping, reading non-required books, visiting and catching up with friends and neighbors - all those things that keep a person sane and connected! I preached at St. James in Lancaster last weekend and will do so at St. Peter's in the Great Valley next Sunday, a fulfilling exercise of ministry that seems to affirm my vocational path even more so.
With all the wonderful experiences of this past year and anticipation of the year to come, I must confess that there is also great sadness in the turning of the years as I grieve that, with each new year, I am one year farther away from the time in which my son walked the earth. 2011 will bring the second anniversary of Seth's death, so this month of January will bring with it the painful memories of his final weeks both here with us and up in New York. I am that much distanced from being able to touch him or hear his beautiful voice, to be the butt of his jokes, or to be the one whose tears were "like kryptonite" to him. The life of a mother who has lost a child is filled with the knowledge that every joy will be tinged with sadness and every memory has the potential to completely undo her.
The good news is that this undoing is not permanent. Life does go on, and a good and beautiful life it is. I am so abundantly blessed with a fantastic husband, a wonderful daughter, affectionate dogs, more friends than I can count, a beautful home, the amazing opportunity to go to seminary and work toward a vocation as an ordained person in the Episcopal Church, and, yes, so much more. I am truly grateful for all of this. If only Seth were here to share it with me, life would be perfect. In his absence, though, I revel in the company of his friends and in their contact with me on Facebook or by e-mail. They continue to grow older while he will always be 24, but it helps to keep him close to me. So to Matt, Rachel, Erin, Mike, Teresa, Kimmie, Ricki, Sarah, Amanda, Janette, Jennafer, Sarah, Mackenzie, Ash, Dan, Josh and all the rest, thank you for being there for Seth and for me. I love you all.
I look forward to returning for a second semester of studies at YDS but am grateful for one more week to relax and putz around the house, spending time with the dogs and the cat if not Tim, who is leaving for business in NC tomorrow. I have so appreciated these two weeks of sleeping in, napping, reading non-required books, visiting and catching up with friends and neighbors - all those things that keep a person sane and connected! I preached at St. James in Lancaster last weekend and will do so at St. Peter's in the Great Valley next Sunday, a fulfilling exercise of ministry that seems to affirm my vocational path even more so.
With all the wonderful experiences of this past year and anticipation of the year to come, I must confess that there is also great sadness in the turning of the years as I grieve that, with each new year, I am one year farther away from the time in which my son walked the earth. 2011 will bring the second anniversary of Seth's death, so this month of January will bring with it the painful memories of his final weeks both here with us and up in New York. I am that much distanced from being able to touch him or hear his beautiful voice, to be the butt of his jokes, or to be the one whose tears were "like kryptonite" to him. The life of a mother who has lost a child is filled with the knowledge that every joy will be tinged with sadness and every memory has the potential to completely undo her.
The good news is that this undoing is not permanent. Life does go on, and a good and beautiful life it is. I am so abundantly blessed with a fantastic husband, a wonderful daughter, affectionate dogs, more friends than I can count, a beautful home, the amazing opportunity to go to seminary and work toward a vocation as an ordained person in the Episcopal Church, and, yes, so much more. I am truly grateful for all of this. If only Seth were here to share it with me, life would be perfect. In his absence, though, I revel in the company of his friends and in their contact with me on Facebook or by e-mail. They continue to grow older while he will always be 24, but it helps to keep him close to me. So to Matt, Rachel, Erin, Mike, Teresa, Kimmie, Ricki, Sarah, Amanda, Janette, Jennafer, Sarah, Mackenzie, Ash, Dan, Josh and all the rest, thank you for being there for Seth and for me. I love you all.
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